So I have been reading through my journals the last week or so and I am amazed and shocked that I wrote some of those entries over a year or two ago! What AMAZING things God has done!!
"And I will lead the blind in a way that they do not know, in paths that they have not known I will guide them. I will turn the darkness before them into light, the rough places into level ground. These are the things I do, and I do not forsake them."
Isaiah 42:16
I was given this verse last summer by a dear friend and it has slowly but surely become "my" verse. When my friend shared this with me I had no idea where my life was headed, no plans, no ideas, nothing, I felt "blind". The only thing I knew I wanted was to do what GOD wanted me to do! I wanted to serve Him wherever and however He wanted. I clung to this promise of God's for dear life, He promised me He would lead me and guide me, make my darkness into light! In Him I am no longer blind.
I continued walking in blind faith for months and there seemed to be open doors here and there but they always shut at the last possible moment. I look back to October 2010, when God so clearly shut the door to go to a college I had really wanted to go to, I sat in my car and wept bitterly and quite honestly got angry with God. "Why?!" was all I could say, "I thought that is what You wanted for me." I felt utterly blind and left in the dark, the only thing I could do was feel God's presence right there with me...His response was "Wait..." and this verse popped into my head. "I will lead you, Rachel. I will make you see. I will make your darkness light, I will NOT forsake you." Ok, God, I choose to trust you and wait...Little did I know how clearly He would make me see...
A few months pass by and an opportunity opened up for me to work with a organization that I dearly loved, but thought my time there was done. This job would take me 1,700 miles away from my closest friends and family... I did not apply for this job, I did not ask for it. It was offered to me, wow!! After much prayer, searching God's Word and asking for Godly counsel, I accepted the position. I struggled with questions like "God, are you SURE this is where you want me?" "I cant move that far away, why would you ask me to do this?" I struggled with thinking that maybe my motives were wrong for accepting this position and whether or not I would be accepted there...the normal human fears...and God's promise in Isaiah kept coming up in my heart and mind, God continued to reassure me to trust Him through passages such as Psalm 37, Proverbs 3:5,6, Matthew 6, and Luke 14 (verse 26 was HUGE to me!)...He continued leading in this direction and I followed.
(I have to say it was the scariest yet most exhilarating decision of my life!!!)
So here I am in Hudson, Florida working for a wonderful ministry! God is teaching me so much but I can honestly say that He has been preparing me for THIS moment in time! Daily I see how the lessons he has taught me in the last couple of years (since I began my relationship with Him) were preparing me for THIS "job"! God is faithful, so faithful to us even when we are not! I am excited to stand on the cusp of this journey with my Lord...O what exciting things He has in store for those who follow Him.... I am reminded of lyrics to a song, "...the greatest treasure reamins for those who gladly choose You (God) now!"
I WILL follow, wherever He leads me, El Chaiyai, The God of my Life!
