Trusting God is hard...

"The Lord directs our steps, so why try to understand everything along the way?"

Proverbs 20:24 (NLT)

"A friend gave me this verse about 2 months ago and told me that this IS my life verse. I laughed but when I read it, it was so true...I am a planner, I like to be in control, I like to KNOW what comes next. I like people to tell me what I'm in for so that I can make the BEST choice...This "walking by Faith" thing sucks for people like me...I NEED the "sight" so that I know where I am going and can plan accordingly.

But you see this way of living as I have been doing causes me to analyze and over analyze and analyze to death decisions that need to be made, things people say to me or do to me and even the way I conduct my own self...I get anxious and worry and quite frankly I get exhausted..."


I posted this blog almost a year ago....so much has changed in my life since then but I still feel like I am learning this lesson. I struggle EVERY day, every hour of every day to Trust my King Jesus with my life...it get so frustrating sometimes but I know that He is working..."He who began a good work in you is FAITHFUL and just to COMPLETE it..." Philippians...WHAT a promise! On days I am impatient with myself instead of getting frustrated I can be THANKFUL for God's patience with me! 

I continue to cling to the TRUTH I know about my Lord: He is God, He created me, He loves me so passionately, He proved His love for me by laying down His life, He overcame this world and all that is in it (death, Satan, sin, ME) when He rose from the dead! He is FAITHful even when I am not, He is righteous, He is love and He is WORKING in me!

Some days it has to be just that simple, clinging to truths that I know. I want to trust Him, I should trust Him, He loves me and He is God but for some stupid reason (aka: my inherited sin nature of me desiring to be my own god of my life....) I dont. 

TRUST in the Lord with ALL your heart! Lean NOT on your own understanding (of things, people, occurances...) but in ALLLL your ways, acknowledge Him (make Him first!) and He WILL direct your steps. Proverbs...WHAT another GREAT promise! 

Teach me Lord, show me how to live as You did and have called me to live. Please give me Faith to trust you and belief to know You so deeply...apart from Your Holy Spirit I cannot love you, believe in You or know how to trust You! Thank you for leaving Your Spirit to guide me and comfort me in my valley of lonliness...Although I may feel lonely in this "Faith walk" learning to trust You, I am not...You are with me wherever I go! Thank you God!!!!!!!